Sierra Mazzucca's Poetry site

Some internal construction is needed on isle brain. Something is jeopardizing the Cortico-Striato-Thalamo-Cortical aka (CSTC) circuitry which is the key brain pathway participating in movement, habit formation, and reward processing. Okay, I say endangering but really its elevating. Like I’m starting to engage in different affairs, I started a new pathway and I haven’t needed to take the old stairs. I recognize this change when I reciprocate and accept feelings a different way than I would have previously when I was taking the old routes that once protected me. We change, continuously. It’s the only thing we can say with assurance as nothing will stay the same forever, everything lives and dies to serve a purpose. The old paths my thoughts would take, made change a scary place so I formed healthy habits and cleaned up the roads to my brains space. I learned to stop, listen, be still. No longer taking old ways up windy hills. My feedback loop will thread positivity and happiness where there once lived dread. I wont obsess over things I should have , would have did, as that would be counterproductive for all the internal construction we just did. Then again I was diagnosed using a dsm-5 OCD is what they now said is a diagnoses of mine. Obsessive compulsive disorder the presence of obsessions and/or compulsions that cause significant distress or impairment in daily life wish I knew this earlier, I would have lived a less stressful life . Ive been scared to try new things, living the same day on repeat , the Truman show was how I felt in this reality . Just stuck, unable to move forward a different way, so comfortable with the teleprompter reading the same message every day . Obsessing over things Out of my control until I lose any false sense of accuracy , no record to compare new to old. control has now been disassembled and no longer holds me whole, closed off those paths and old frontal roads. Its just a disorder its not a terminal disease you can actually manage it, before you become dis-eased .

By Sierra Mazzucca