It makes me sad that as a little girl I believed Iβd find my Prince Charming and we would get that happy fairytale ending. Much like the ones I would hear read to me at bedtime. Or the drilling from my father that if I was cleaned up enough, I would get to marry money and comfort, would be in sight. I would just have to be a good girl and an even better wife. Marry a doctor, a lawyer, or a professional hustler for security. He didnβt encourage me to be successful, just a successful bride. It was shown early on to me, there was no need to marry for love or what is right. Now I see this was a fatherβs lazy offering to get himself off the line of teaching and fathering. So, I grew up and kept waiting and waiting for my prince savior to arrive before me. I waited and no one ever came. Nobody to kiss me awake, to whisk me away. So I kept my heart open but welcomed nothing inside. I was being held captive by myself, the dragon who guarded the line between fiction and real life. I needed to be slayed, in order to be freed from someone elseβs narrative, that kept me feeling unworthy and incomplete. Always comparing myself to what I was taught to believe. I trusted a book of made-up stories and lies my underdeveloped mind made into facts I held onto very tight. I believed my dad, who would be the main offender of my 1st broken heart, which Iβd eventually need to mend. Same guy who showed me to not trust anybody completely because they will leave, and he did that without even talking. I eventually learned that my life isnβt some fairytale story I was told it could be. Even after all that, there is a gullible girl inside me, holding onto hope for her prince charming.
#poetry #poet #Lapoet #Tales


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