I’ve been monitoring the new lines that appear all over my body, while trying to embrace time. I once counted each new gray but I have found it impossible to keep track of them with each new day. I enter my plea with my maker before I put my mind and body to sleep. I hold space and hope that he won’t forget to wake me. As the humans mind is overloaded with wastes of time, by dreading issues that are yours not mine. I find myself begging for you to just end this life. When situations are too painful for faith to be found within my mind. Like love, is it just a game I will forever not get picked to play? Or do you promise that to me one day? I’m fading like a dream when one awakes. I will be gone before another loves breath breaks. I stopped searching as you asked of me. But I think now that was the devil just impersonating. For many years I’ve been alone, and wondered what I did to earn your scold. Was I a murderer three times fold? I’m to repeat a life of lonely desperate disease. I’ve been keeping track of the depths of pain to which I can further retreat. But I went so low, lucifer was the only one willing to greet me. I thought I was loyal to the almighty but it doesn’t matter. You have plans I can’t control and you will make sure for my past I am forever smited.
Care to share ?