Hi, I’m Sierra Mazzucca. I want to welcome to my little corner of the internet—where words find their way through the heart’s tangled paths. This blog is home to poetry born from the quiet and loud moments of life. I write to give shape to what we often struggle to say—grief, love, healing, hope, faith, and the simple weight of everyday experience. Whether you’re navigating mental health challenges, processing loss, celebrating love, or searching for something deeper, I hope my words meet you where you are. Each poem is a reflection, a release, a reminder that you’re not alone. Thank you for being here.

  • Stages

    I pray as you age, that I get to see every stage. Yes, it may be sad to witness the new wrinkles and grays, but to have you throughout the many different changes that await.To be there with you, no matter the newest sign of age. I guess with every new day the only bitter thing I can say is, that we near closer to a place where you will not get to see me go through those same stages of gray. I pray that as I near the end of my time, I am able to look back and remember all the moments we shared all the different stages between you and I. So, I will enjoy you when I don’t, and even more when I do. I’m just so blessed to have a resilient mother in this lifetime, who is as strong and brave like you. My mom,my first stage, the first heartbeat my ears heard play. I love you no matter how far distance says we are. What a beautiful gift to experience life and all it gives from entrance to exit. What a gift to experience time, what a present it is to be born, to live, to laugh, grow old and die.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • English Ivy in the mirror

    Hey, would you care to chat? Actually, I think you should take a seat, and listen as a matter of fact. Don’t take this too hard but you’re invasive, like English Ivy; smothering. You are very ostentatious. Seeking any eyes admiration. You’re pretentious and that word could be found carved into your tooth’s cavity, by a craigslist dentist. Probably how you started to speak your own language. Guess it’s expected the Novocain has you singing notes of your testament, in Life’s chair found is your true confessions . What has you trembling, feeling like now’s the time to confess your sins? The end has always been subjective, but nonetheless expected. He forgives , though sadly humans don’t forget, the wrongs onto them that were committed by wickedness. Recently I learned that it wasn’t by a stranger who made me hurt, it was but a memory of one of my past characters. That cuts. So it’s onto getting through overcrowded unreliable thoughts from different versions that were shed, when we changed and evolved on, just a memory in our head. Moments of you, from versions of few, where all the characters were played by no one other than you. Lead was always within you. That is what I just learned. That everyone you meet, everyone you’ve hurt, they are just external parts of you existing still trying to gain worth. Its an odd truth to observe, but it tickles your thoughts and makes you reconsider being unkind to anyone as they are just a reflection of you from the past lives that lived within you.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Sessions

    Regret has found me knocking at its door again. Shame answered immediately as if it had been waiting for its old friend. Opening its door where the comfy couch is that I turn my thoughts over in exchange for inner peace and solace. There is a spot molded to my body where I take my seat. This time I have anger and it’s taking over me. It’s like my prefrontal cortex hired another conductor to lead. In my body, challenging my amygdala and triggering my hypothalamus to retreat. Losing its control, leaving me alone with only me, in charge of my big E’s. Now I am more uncomfortable than I was before therapy. And 49 more minutes before I leave is when I start to recognize a hormonal response, where the physical changes start to take over me. I’m a fighter so my prefrontal cortex reminds me and regulates all the Big E’s to manageable little E’s. Making my response to negative thoughts minimal and not self-depleting. STILL, I slip and sometimes forget how easy it is to get sucked back into it; the negative thought flow you became so familiar with. I don’t want to sit with this. Tired of these weekly couch sessions. Just want to be able to control emotions and let go of past transgressions without checking in to my next confession session. So my goal is set, no more emotional ding-dong ditch. I won’t knock on doors where shame will surely answer it. I am releasing regret and guilt daily so that one day I will wake up and be able to take a deep breath without feeling like I am suffocating. Until then I am again, signed in for my 1 pm session.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Age

    Yes, it is unequivocally true, your beauty will fade. Your skin once tight, will start to drape and hang in unexplainable ways. Discoloration will begin to splotch and take place, upon your once evenly toned body and newly lined face. Your vision will get blurrier with every new age. Your hair will thin, and color change. Your wrinkles will deepen with every smile that stays a little too long, forever imprinting its frame. Your memories will escape from any accessible place. It’s a slow death from a life full of moments you meticulously made, but inevitably forget. Your heart’s beat will lose rhythm, and sound slowly. In the end, we often regret because we were in such a hurry not to leave, not to age, not to gray. So focused on a temporary body, which we knew would expire one day. So yes, there will be change taking place. I like to imagine aging means we are that much closer to another energy state. So let it fade. Let the wrinkles and discoloration take place. Remember they are little reminders this body was never a permanent space.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Memento mori

    36, and I’m grateful to be alive. Still in the back of my mind: Memento mori , “Remember that you will die”. So today I will do and not try. I will let go of the illusion that I can control every outcome because that’s the ill man’s delusional idea of how to manipulate time. Detach from the illusion of control. Just understand the future does not exist in this moment. Here and now is all we know. No matter how tightly you hold on, things will find a way to go . If everything was certain and nothing ever changed, life would be a stagnant body of water no Currents to shift its way. What a boring existence for the being’s part to play. We were already dying the day we were formed because time is not afraid. It existed before and will after the day the last human remains. So the celebration of another three hundred and sixty-five days has a feeling of accomplishment for another trip around the sun my skin sack has made. What is future but a mere wish, a hopeful gift , we should all be grateful if we get. I am alive now, but I remember we die, so I won’t waste breath on wishing for endless time. So here’s to 36, finally loving to be alive.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Fear is not reality

    Fear is worry that does not exist, but only in your mind. Such an odd coincidence, that I created this sickness with all the pointless worries of mine. If you are suffering about something that does not exist in real time, well that is insanity and for most of us that’s a short trip & a long ride. Not even realizing we have been self-prescribing pain and sadness because of untrue thoughts derived from a blackness, just madness. We always took the regimen of fear straight to the brain, a quick end to any roads led by faith with strength. We expected and incorrectly predicted tragedy making ourselves sick when in reality we were our own sickness. We were our own creator of a life of travesty. Didn’t even stop to analyze myself because fear made me think it was everyone else. So I hung up unwanted signs within myself and in large it spelled out: fear will never serve you well. So if you find it don’t allow it to stay. Just hang a sign that reads: Fear is not welcome to play. I have had to stay in many days to protect my mind from whatever lie I was too weak and let inside causing me to lose hours of daylight. Tossing at night over things that ultimately only existed in a frazzled state of mind. Fear is the unwanted weed grown from the inside, you are the gardener of all new growth. So it is your choice to let it grow or eliminate the dark-rooted seed before it multiplies. Fear does not exist in reality, but only in your mind.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • So, that’s why

    So you needed to break me to make me. You want to reform my soul before you take me. Well then, I surrender because of fate it should be. I am not defeated. They were not empty sufferings. But more Contractions, birth pains.. I was being reborn again. Prepared for the glorious day when I can say I am alive and living with inner grace. Where I truly believe I am an image of him that which he made me. A mirror of his reflection, constantly elevating. Strengthening and awakening deep parts where only his prayers can take me. Places where forgiveness waits for me. My thoughts once oppressed by shadows of misdirect, that I learned recently were not of his fate but they were also not a punishment.. I know he hasn’t forsaken me, he hasn’t let go. Sometimes Love must wound to heal, they say the pain is the lesson which I believe is real. The more scars the deeper the conversations and self-realizations with GOD are. So yes, you need to break before you can be your best and truly Divine. Its grace, and it’s not always smooth sailing as we will find. It’s not the lack of him in your life, but rather a strong presence and reminder he’s always by your side.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • RSVP for Loneliness

    I once heard Loneliness is an invitation to become still it is not a punishment. What happens when you realize you are already complete? That you wasted years looking for some missing piece and parts of a false story you were fed from infancy. When all along you were the hero of that fantasy. False, like all those rescue stories read to all the little she’s, where we were told we needed to be saved from the dragon blocking our gentle hearts’ entry from some vicious monster coincidentally. What if those dragons were mere reflections of you, of your inner warrior defending all the fragile parts within you? Realizing no one is coming to slay the dragon that seems to defend you. Finally understanding that was a false fable fed to restrain and constrain you. You now see, that isolation was never an exile but an initiation to be free. Being alone is liberating but people assume it is a weakness with nothing happy. When in fact only in solitude can one find their true self, that our masks have been holding back from ourselves. Most people apply a mask before introducing themselves to the other actors involved in the cast. Never learning being alone is freeing, as you no longer feel the need to impress or put on an act. You don’t need permission to be happy. That sentence slammed against my chest, like a ball to bat. There is no script that can be memorized until you truly believe you are the perfect fit and role for that. All along I was waiting for someone to grant me a pass to some form of happiness I never believed I alone could have. Always trying to get permission from people who are in no position to delegate my existence missions if it be, “solo path”. Especially after learning the facts. I can’t slay a dragon, if she is me, and my inner strength I never thought I had. I don’t need a prince like those fairytales encouraged me to have. I just needed to pet my little dragon, while reassuring her that I now will have her back. Without being alone I wouldn’t have been able to process all of that. So here is to my invitation to loneliness, I hope I get an RSVP back.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Peculiar

    It’s a peculiar thing to stop and think that we are all just chasing some invisible trophy to the end of our earthly human occupancy. Where completion of existence could be looked at as a loss or gain depending on who you’re asking. Racing to a finish line, with said golden cities on the other side, which later we find out doesn’t exist but it allowed us to cope with time. We are programmed from infancy to believe that we are not complete until we have X, Y and Z and then only then will we be happy and free. This is the grand illusion of a destination that creates a perpetual sense that we are always incomplete. It grows a notion that there is always gonna be something missing. We are so focused on the end that the present eludes us and this is the real death , when living while always trying to find something greater than this moment to access. Like the faith we conveniently forget, even after we are woken up day after day and our lungs gifted with breath. We are too blinded by the next step and too self-consumed to accept this is our fate. Running through life like it’s an emergency. Appreciate this time, not the minutes or days that are hopefully ahead or far behind. No rush just letting it flow smoothly in Its own way. No explanations, no justification needed as that is not a bridge but a cage to the deepest parts of your brain. It’s a peculiar thing when you stop and think the only race in my world has been led by me. There might be more to this life than the human eyes can see, but the wonderful thing about true faith, is the trusting in your decision choosing this body to live and participate.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Overcame to feel

    Have you ever felt bombarded by yourself, like you can’t help but keep inundating your brains cell with messages that no longer serve you well. Sadly it’s this path you in the past paved, whose entrance and exit still lead to and from hell. It’s obvious there are parts of you that you have lost within one of those past versions of yourself. Recently I genuinely feel like Jack and Jill, like I’m falling down an endless hill. Passing all the hurdles I previously overcame while climbing up life’s hill. It’s always an emotional roller coaster, when you take a step back and look down at the sharp turns and loops life has had. I’m just supposed to shut up and sit back. Just be still and zip past without evidence of the goals I reached, limits I surpassed. That ride is evident there was nothing decent in those versions of me I played in the past. Still just expecting the next lead, while I understudy me, the main role for the next cast. Which coincidentally is written and directed by yours truly. The amount of non existing acts I often incorrectly predict, should be a tell tale sign of all of it. I am bombarded, but I am also the cause of it. Accountability is the obligation to accept responsibility. I am accountable for the construction and repairs, but will that start the mend of all the old tracks in there? This is where good ol faith needs to be your best friend, even if it’s a challenging mindset to befriend. It takes trials in the past that you overcame, to give you strength and courage in moments of possible future disdain. So thank you for flooding my past paths way. For forcing me to start a new course with more possibilities that outpour positivity within this new brains channel wave.

    By Sierra Mazzucca