Hi, I’m Sierra Mazzucca. I want to welcome to my little corner of the internet—where words find their way through the heart’s tangled paths. This blog is home to poetry born from the quiet and loud moments of life. I write to give shape to what we often struggle to say—grief, love, healing, hope, faith, and the simple weight of everyday experience. Whether you’re navigating mental health challenges, processing loss, celebrating love, or searching for something deeper, I hope my words meet you where you are. Each poem is a reflection, a release, a reminder that you’re not alone. Thank you for being here.

  • Meeting time

    Sending out a signal to all involved. We need to set a meeting for the parts that go AWOL. My subconscious has been running me tirelessly, without even thinking of asking consciousness to intervene. My preconscious, must be on an endless unauthorized leave, allowing my sub to lead. So I then am left with an outdated, broken tape recorder replaying only the untruths about me, with no ending seen. It all started the very first moment I swallowed a negative self- thought allowing it to breed, birthing a recording of only the bad in me. Which I to revert to when I am in need. This tape was an enemy, who I allowed to befriend the most precious and delicate parts of me. It was false reassuring messages I would keep on repeat, because I never allowed anything positive for my memory to keep. I didn’t know I had the ability to stop these old lies from ruminating endlessly in my mind. I never believed anything then what I felt on the inside. Sadly that was infected and infested from all the years of being angry, bitter, full of self -resentment and traumatic triggers. I wanted to have a meeting to show my thanks, but to also reclaim my life and insert a new tape. This one will host my preconscious state. I learned my lesson, so I won’t hit record unless the message recorded plays how capable and worthy I am for everything that comes my way. I am strong, I am light, I am blessed to live life. I am love, I feel love, I am alive on the inside. This meeting is complete , hope the message was received, subconscious you no longer need to be the lead. I need you but, you need new programing. Minutes entered, have a great day. Remember think, process then react accordingly.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Faulty source

    All of these concepts we have learned to believe, they’re nonsense. Don’t worry as we were just following lead. We couldn’t see any different because we were brainwashed with their creed. They convinced us of our roles, which were to take on unquestionably. The parts we play were created by ancestors past generations who also couldn’t see, the very blueprint of living they’d been following. It was built from another’s fears that they themselves didn’t believe. Faith was a villain at some point in history, as it allowed us to trek on the same road, we saw others suffering on miserably. That very same word, allowed a deeper voice to be heard eventually. It was only when we found the source of our pain and misery that we detached from it, like a cord from a faulty outlet who no longer supports our needs. We have realized we channel and manifest the good, the bad, the in between, and then the universe delivers generously. We can now safely discard those GPS instructions for living, that were installed before infancy. They only took us to places where someone else’s imagination would limit our ability to think freely. So burn the old books and stories they fed. Delete the old routes to living that were embedded in your head. You don’t have to put on a costume just because the generations before you did. Society is finally waking up and seeing the truth, we have all been pawns in a game of chess unable to make our own move. I choose to start living before the end of my line, which makes a full circle back with a new message in tact, just follow your heart. No more following someone else’s map.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Restoration

    Returning back to previous state would be a dream if I were a butterfly, with wings that could carry me far away. From the beginning point where anguish became my cape, unable to fly, too heavy was my hearts weight. I got stuck, I couldn’t move. I was forced to face the cocoons dark space. It was time with no face before I broke free and shed the comfort that restored me. Or so I thought, but the want for restoration is the first box to check off. There are many exits and check points along the way. Despair waits like a stop sign at an all 4 way. Sometimes you hang there a little too long, you slowly forget that you can choose to move on. You get comfortable with everything going wrong, so you unconsciously manifest it all to prolong. Preventing the freedom, you once blocked yourself from. The one you convinced yourself you didn’t deserve because you made an internal agreement, that was never actually yours. You have and always had the ability to decide which way to go, which weighted belief to hold onto and which to toss aside. Like the caterpillar shedding its chrysalis, who shelters it through the changes for many nights until the last stage of histogenesis the process where the body reorganizes its Insides. It doesn’t ever return back to its previous state but after the hard transition a beautiful butterfly will take its place.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Seedlings

    Everyone is different. No, we are not the same. However, we all bare common the gift of humanity and some the curse of ancestral chains. Most of my life I believed there must be something wrong with me. I couldn’t think a positive thought. I couldn’t break free from the messages I had been fed through my roots, before any early memory. I always just thought well maybe everyone in my family is poisoned and bad, but we were all just making do with the chains our past ancestors had built and attached. I always felt less than never enough, but those were never my feelings. It was the infected soil and environment in which I had grown up. No one ever believed such a far past lived history, could still have relevancy. But it did, because it was trying to suffocate me. So, I decided I would break free. Even if I do not get to reap the benefits living, at least I know my daughter will get to see a life full of endless possibilities. Replanting with my healed seeds so all future legacies will be able to root in soil that supports growth, love and community. Never feeling like a burden on humanity because some ancestor planted their fear and anger, which rooted and clung onto my family tree. So like the Dandelions as they change, they leave behind seeds that turn into seedlings which grow more weeds. Without the wind the seeds would not spread to grow. Humans, need a bit of force to thrive. Still we need to keep old beliefs in the past as they will poison our new roots preventing healthy life. Everyone is different but some may find we share the same want and that is to live purposefully and experience life.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Changing

    The change is occurring. You know the big change. No one really talks about the one after age 30, that our bodies and minds start to see. The transition from youth to maturity. It was only observed but seldom thought about to converse. I never planned for gravity to sneak up on me and disturb my body so intrusively. I didn’t dream of a day where my hairs would start to thin and turn gray. Or for my memory so early on, to play keep away. I never anticipated that the vulnerable body I once despised, would become one I now loved to be in and no longer hide. No one said that the limits I believed, were just previous boundaries, built by other peoples fears who came before me. They never said taking them on would decrease my ability to reach. I had to learn that on my own, as these things they didn’t know and they couldn’t teach. I never imagined I could learn to listen before I speak,specifically to myself. Because no one encouraged me to believe that what I thought or felt was worthy. As they didn’t know they were deserving. No one really knew this change was certain. I just wish I learned sooner to love the skin I am in, the body I reside and the soul I encase. I would have enjoyed every single moment a minute longer, at a slower pace. Boxed more memories, so I have backup just in case. We are changing every day. So I am telling you now to mentally prepare ahead, today. Let’s start savoring every single second you get in this vessel that will store all your memories in a safe space, because one day that will be your only escape from a body and mind the world slowly takes back and confiscates. Now you know the change is inevitable, so embrace the body and mind that time has still allowed you to still call mine.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • It’s Yours

    Ever since I can recall, happiness and joy were never eager friends, they were no friend of mine at all.

    So when I found myself starting to experience glee, I would tell myself it didn’t belong to me.

    I tried desperately to control that E, but my brain was wired, and it was working against me.

    So whenever something joyful and exciting occurred, I would convince myself it was not mine and how could I feel it was mine to deserve.

    Cherophobia is an irrational aversion to happiness, worried something will happen.

    It’s a belief. Which is an acceptance of a statement, it can only thrive when we give it energy to survive.

    Its just my whole life anytime I have felt immense peace, my brain literally gets on the loud speaker and announces this feeling has no business inside me.

    That false message is usually pushed out by anticipatory anxiety, always scared of future events as they are not controlled by me.

    This is very informing, but now present paralysis has taken the lead, and I am trapped in a cycle of worry, for nothing.

    No real reason, just the false beliefs inside me. Which are evidence of past trauma that’s just been piling.

    Making it difficult to believe that after everything, I have the space for self-love inside of me.

    But I do, and always did.

    I let the false message from outside sources penetrate my hippocampus again and again.

    So the helmet of salvation has made its way in, I AM WORTHY of love, health, wealth, and endless peace.

    May as long as you have breath circulating you remember to believe, happiness begins inside.

    and no one can take that from you or I.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

    Los Angeles Poet

    #healing #faith #poetry

  • Happy 27th Mom

    27 years before today, my mom was about ready to give up any faith. My memory held moments I rather keep away. Loud. Lots of yelling, cursing swearing about. Mom always worried, now on her toes scared dad would find out . Mom was tired of the pain she endured every day and she was over being treated like a live in slave. Most days before the rooms became her safe space, mom had to deal with 4 little kids, wild animals as dad would say. My mom would numb herself from the pain, she didn’t understand yet that the very substance she praised was the villain keeping her mind a prisoner causing her body to stay in an unsafe place. She felt she was a victim because her addiction made her think this way. I can almost remember the very day, she walked into a room, took a seat and listened diligently. She came home but it wasn’t the same woman who left earlier, no. This was a warrior who knew she had so much fight for life left. Dad started to see her change and for someone who preferred ownership, he was beside himself, he expressed the betray. Not that long after my mom finally got away. She had been joining circles in these rooms for many days. It was like they were giving her back her life, her light started to brighten and shine. Anywhere she went darkness was sure to hide. She kept her chin up and head held high, even when she didn’t have a dime or place for her babies to reside. My mom stood in lines, putting her ego aside just so her kids could have food, shelter and peace of mind. 27 years later, and that warrior is still on the front lines. She has never backed down, even when the world tried. If anyone deserves a celebration, it’s my mom for giving us a second chance at life. I love you mom, more than any word can describe.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

    #LosAngelesPoet #hope #recover

  • Dear Little big boy

    Someone needs to be honest with you, so here it is. Your company lacks substance and I’m sure you will never have it. You make my blood run cold and not in a good way. You make me feel like you are the hunter and I the prey. You give me the creeps obsessing over me, I ended things, this is a bit stalker-ee, don’t ya think? Rhetorical, don’t answer because then you will manipulate me to stay and chat and I know you know I dislike the thought of that. So you send flowers back to back, they meet my door, then the trash. Please leave me alone this is not cute, it gives me anxiety. I just want to be forever rid of you. Stop showing up at my door and sending me gifts. Stop with the calls, none will be taken. Just get the memo, your position was eliminated. I do not like you NOT 1 BIT, stop stalking me, how many restraining orders do I have to get. It’s odd you say so many good things about yourself, all I see is a little boy who cant take the word no so well. How many ways can I spell it out, you’ve got too many issues I do not want, and I will stay without. You’re the MVP, most vindictive person around. I’m better single on my own, then being manipulated by some little boy who doesn’t understand the word, NO!

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • She feels familiar

    I saw her sitting on the swing by herself. I noticed there was another swing available, so I took it upon myself and joined her, so she wouldn’t be by herself. I knew what that felt like and it wasn’t nice, so I put myself into her shoes, and to my shock they fit just right. I thought well that’s ,weird I’m bigger in age and height. Then, I noticed her clothes they were familiar from my past, but they fit her just right. She also had a beauty mark on her face, in the same place that mine remained. But I shrugged it off and swung my legs to catch up to her pace. She found me shoulder to shoulder sharing the same smile across my face. Our eyes met and the color and shape were exactly the same. Our swings then slowed down and we both stopped. She looked over at me, paused and very low and softly asked why has it taken you so long? With the pressure of tears building up behind my eyes, fighting them back I gently replied, because it took me awhile to face the truth inside. That at some point I allowed the world to break you and I. I couldn’t protect us then, and shield us from what others did and some still do. That even applies to me and you. Because a long time ago I allowed you to feel alone and made you believe you were not worth anyone’s love not even your own. But I was wrong to make us digest ill lies all because of a fear that I grew, since faith was invisible to the naked eye. And my belief that things could change became a distant dream of mine. But we are so valuable and worthy, we deserve love for every breath of ours is deserving, and I hope you know we are loved, YOU and I. . I stopped and waited for her response but she was silent and just stared back at me. It was in that moment I felt a release. It was the heavy weight I had carried that didn’t belong to her or me. She eventually stood up from her swing, and came closer to me, put one little hand on my shoulder and the other on my heart, she leaned in and whispered, without you we wouldn’t have made it this far. She then walked off into a sunset with red and orange hues, she looked back one last time and said I love you, thank you . I immediately felt this jolt of happiness, she was free and I was finally accepting of inner peace.

    By Sierra Mazzucca

  • Frankenstein

    I’m gonna do it again, put my fears, questions and worries into my pen. Watch the ink release the hold its grip has had me in. Fear has been my main attraction. I never need a ticket as I dictate and delegate all of the action and many transactions. That’s right your eyes and ears seen and heard correct. I am Frankenstein, the inventor of the dread that has had me crippled within my own head. I made this bed. I meticulously formed places for my mistrust, faithless, fear driven, case-less theories, to root and grow. Swallowing me whole, for already forgiven sins, from the box man In confession. Now to redo that section without deception, as deceitful balloons eventually pop from the misconception, that you are free after 10 hail Mary’s and your donated fiscal blessing into the box. I release the pressure I created in my own head. How peaceful it feels, to just let your hearts kettle decompress and express, anything that has been fighting to live within you without loves breath. Hatred was starting to form and take over my head. Faith never left, it just stepped aside and allowed me the opportunity to decide if I was going to continue to turn myself into a monster I despise or into a being full of hope and life. He gave us choice, and only in our time will we be able to give it a voice. Not even a scientist can theorize the truth its invisible except to few. We are our own hope operators, mental surgeons, word makers, feeling scientists and yes confessional takers . The need has always been within, the keys were always there to find. It was the lock that you placed before you let go of fear from your mind, that kept you crippled and discouraged from any attempt to fight for your own life.

    By Sierra Mazzucca