Sierra Mazzucca's Poetry site

Seriously.
Why won’t you leave permanently?
You have never made me feel strong like I can do anything.
You only ever wanted me down and blue.
I tried to change you.
I did stuff that could heal you.
But you are so intent, on making me feel see-through.
I went to the man with a degree to silence your mockery.
He prescribed a pill that would rid you from me.

I was so hopeful, that I believed you would actually leave.
But no matter the name of the pill he prescribed, you wouldn’t go away.
You were attached me.
The pills made you laugh, but you were very mad at the fact I was trying to detach you from me.
I decided if the scripts won’t work, then I have to fight you.
ME to Me.
To reclaim my peace.
That you just won’t allow me to keep.

Since I was a child all you did was control me.
Tell me untrue things to get a tighter hold on me.
Tell me everything bad, to feel alone and lonely.
But you are a liar, and I no longer believe.
You have done damage, I am now repairing.
You are vile and scary.
Don’t think I forgot all the times, you persuaded me I was better off disappearing.
I was only a child when you said life is better without me.

As you controlled my head with the lies you pushed me to believe.
But I am grown now, and I have tools to protect me.
You can visit, but I made an exit for you to leave.
Go left.
I’m not asking. I’m telling.
I’m tired of being scared of what you have in store next for me.

I am a human with feelings.
And I deserve to be free, and happy.
I will not allow you to control, continue to defile my spirit, mind and body.
You may be part of me currently.
But you will never have all of me, not permanently.
Stay in your place, before I find a pill to make you defenseless, and happy for the rest of me.